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Desire ...04/22/2005 02:24:05 pm

Recently, your host Right Wing Bob subscribed via email to a thing called FREECYCLE. For those not hip enough to know, this is an internet-based group that enables people to find homes for items which they no longer need or want. It was no doubt initiated by the kind of individuals who wake up in a cold sweat every night imagining that their back yard is being engulfed by a land fill. The idea is simple: you post what you have to offer to the group, and anyone who wants it can get in touch with you and arrange to pick it up.

Now, it used to be that the "Goodwill" filled this role in people's lives, but you would generally have to lug the stuff to the store yourself - and, let's face it, some junk is too junky even for them. For those too pained to just leave it on the curb, or set fire to it, there is now a way to find a willing taker, for the mere price of an email and the willingness to tell a stranger on the internet where you live.

In addition to posting what you'd like to offer, you may also post what you'd like to receive. However, to avoid it becoming nothing but a big wish-list, there are rules: only one "WANTED" post per day (or per week, or something) per individual. I'm dubious as to how well the rules are enforced, since WANTEDs seem to outnumber OFFERs by a factor of five or more in my Inbox.

And it was whilst scanning my Inbox over the last few days that something struck me. If you took this long list of things being offered, and other things being wanted, and edited it a bit, and threw in some formatting, and drank a scotch or two, you would end up with something very close to ... pure poetry!

And so this is what I did. I've extracted posts that seemed to resonate with me for one reason or another, formatted them a little, redacted precise email addresses where necessary, and assembled them into my big statement on America in 2005 (with a suitably Dylanesque title). It speaks to what we are willing to give, versus what we yearn to receive and ... and it speaks to so many other things besides (feel free to speculate so long as you credit Right Wing Bob for any insights at which you arrive).

DESIRE

Sender ............. Subject.................................................... .Date

WithAnEye@--.com OFFER: Women's Panties ... Thu 04/21

mattdecico WANTED: Guitars and Keyboards ...Wed 04/20

laeve88 WANTED: Floor Tiles ...Wed 04/20

momwriter2004 OFFER: Susan Powter Stop the Insanity program ...Fri 04/22

r63gomez WANTED Honeywell transformer model AT-20D or AT-72D ...Thu 04/21

fluffy830 WANTED: Wall mount Air Conditioner ...Thu 04/21


glaistig16@--.com
WANTED: Newborn stuff for girl ...Thu 04/21

stella150 OFFER: Non working ocean aquarium from Fisher Price ...Thu 04/21

Tara C. WANTED: Bicycle ...Thu 04/21

peacebearhippohug WANTED: PICNIC TABLE or 2 stumps and a plank. ...Thu 04/21

dthelen_101 OFFER: Pampers Pants Coupons ...Thu 04/21

cindy WANTED: glass/time- misplaced number ...Thu 04/21

OoChiEWaLLi@--.com WANTED: Bright Colored Couch/Sofa ...Thu 04/21

dianakash685 OFFER: Playbill magazines ...Thu 04/21

Leyna WANTED: QUEEN BOLT ON BED FRAME/RAILS ...Thu 04/21

carolltommy OFFER::::::::::COIN WRAPERS::::::::::::: ...Thu 04/21

jdp3000000 WANTED: Baby Excersaucer ...Wed 04/20

listrejects WANTED: SUSPENSION GRID SYSTEM FOR 2' X 2' or 2' X 4' CEILING TILES ...Thu 04/21

aroid_mama OFFER: Book- Office 2000 Bible ...Thu 04/21

scenario180 WANTED: Floor Tiles, or used TV set ...Wed 04/20

indigo110473 WANTED: Spider Plant Babies ...Wed 04/20

Roz F. LAST RE-OFFER: Bag of Technical/Job Search Books... ...Thu 04/21

Melissa WANTED: index card organizer box or rolodex or something else ...Wed 04/20

indigo110473 WANTED: Renu Contact lens solution ...Wed 04/20

W Perez WANTED: Palmvx ...Wed 04/20

W Perez WANTED: any MP3 player. ...Wed 04/20

slash630 OFFER:Saturday Night Live VHS Tapes- ...Thu 04/21

Spencer WANTED - broken laptop a few years old ...Thu 04/14

***

There you have it. I felt that Spencer's "broken laptop a few years old" was a suitably poignant note to end on. It's the only "WANTED" post I was tempted to respond to, if only to ask, "How broken do you want it, Spencer?" but I resisted and maintained my poetic distance. It's a lonely calling.

 

Broken cutters, broken saws,
Broken buckles, broken laws,
Broken bodies, broken bones,
Broken voices on broken phones.
Take a deep breath, feel like you're chokin',
Everything is broken.

 

 


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